Vesper Zephyr

今年是2010年。

1800年前，火燒赤壁的周公瑾殞落了。

400年前，人稱「戰國第一猛將」的本多忠勝與世長辭。

100年前，一代武術大師霍元甲逝世了。

100年後，世界會是什麼樣貌？

400年後，將會發生什麼事？

1800年後，歷史又將如何演變？

沒有人知道答案。

因為生命的本質便是如此，唯一能確定的是「不確定性」。

 「你不告而別，我才後知後覺。」這句話大概是許多人心中的感嘆吧？張雨生已經離開十二年了，但他那如天籟般驚豔世人的嗓音，卻教我難以忘壞。也許這就是人之常情，總是要等到失去之後，才懂得珍惜。

   聆聽張雨生唱的歌時，常常會想哭。除了那動人心弦、千迴百轉的曼妙旋律，和沁人心脾、高亢清亮的歌聲之外，還有那一句句彷彿夾雜絃外之音，卻又令人心酸的歌詞。像是《我的未來不是夢》當中的「因為我，不在乎，別人怎麼說」與《我期待》裡的幾句：「我期待，有一天我會回來」、「Say goodbye. 昂首闊步，不留一絲遺憾」到《後知後覺》裡頭的「你功成身退，我不及言謝；你不告而別，我才後知後覺」，似乎一切冥冥之中都早已注定。或許命運就是這麼不可捉摸、朦朧難解吧？

   有人曾經這麼說：「此聲只應天上有，人生能得幾回聞？老天爺發現了這個錯誤，於是把張雨生帶走了。」回過頭來想一想，說不定真的是這麼一回事。這般歌聲、這般詞曲，已成絕響。

   人事已非，樂曲猶在，世間不會再有第二個張雨生了。我只能聽著他的歌曲，期待自己能回到最初的愛，明白原始的情懷。

Books, books, a sea of books! I surfed my way through immense waves of antediluvian paper, on which were passé notes of all kinds! They were somewhat soppy, kind of absurd, a bit erratic, and perhaps preposterous. Well, what can you do about it? Time just flies, somehow even faster than the locomotion of light! Yet something storms even far more swiftly─the thought of human mind. Thus, I decided to catch a glimpse of them once again.

3/24
I just don’t know which road remaining should be taken. Beyond that point of the summit, could there really be an emerald-green forest? Or might it be an endlessly arid desert, where nothing save drought is to be descried? Hiemal wind blows relentlessly… I want not fall, but the frigid night of eternal darkness has eaten away my faith, if I still have faith left. I can only give it to the savage wind, watch it as it follows the withered seeds of dreams, wobbling away. Hence, I let go…
That small seed, flying…may it descend on the other side of the ridge, and grow into a world of perpetual spring.

4/7 
Perhaps when tomorrow dawns, the mien of the world will alter. Perhaps when tomorrow dawns, people will grieve not any longer. Perhaps when I eventually step across the gates of Utopia, the advent of dream’s end shall become reality. All has gone away as though dust and ashes, vanishing and regressing to nihility. Sporadic drops of tears decorate the permanent winter. An agile dove glides through the passing of time. The fjord which used to embrace the color of lapis lazuli, has anon become a vacant ravine; the garden of paradise has changed into a tumulus of hell. The world… so volatile, so capricious… Finally, perhaps the rain will cease. Perhaps the sun will once again radiate its beams of ardor.

4/21
Let the soft zephyr send the letters! I yearn to sail away, following the alacritous foam, towards the wonderland afar. Accompanied by the cacophonous blessing of the albatross, I espy a shadow of a beluga beneath the face of the ocean. I behold the reincarnation of sun and moon. None shall deter my journey nor thwart my resolution, not even the utmost tempestuous squall. The horrendous waves roar; they hurl me ferociously into the sky. I glance upon the sheeny stars, for one last moment. I plummet, falling into the fathomless, murky abysm. But may it become another legend of the seas.

4/28   
Stars scowl at the terra like rancorous eyes full of ire; they outshine even the brightest moon. Sparks bellow, along with the howling wind, ready to start a prairie fire. The world is suddenly transformed into a purgatory of hellish blaze. I stand on the arête of the highest mountain. The icy snow which once belonged there has already melted away, becoming torrents of tears, heading off the cliffs and into the gorges. I try to defend that last flower alive, a rose varnished with blood. Flames are devouring all that shares existence. “Please condone my perverse sins…I am to live for you, and die for you!”

Reading finished. I could not but emit an asinine guffaw. The mindsets of the past cannot be comprehended anymore. I guess I could say: “Never changed is the changing of the world.” Come what may, the future is not mine to see.

Dear friends,

Summer air is always homey and zestful, as the splendid sun embraces us with thermal passion. Tender zephyr blows, across the path of our lives, chasing the days which have anon gone away. Summer, is a season of reminiscence.

“Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.” This is what Optimus Prime said. And now, I have the exact same feeling. Graduation…it seems to be an elusive stage of our journey. Tears and laughter, bliss and lament…all fuzed together. I tried to save my valedictions in belief of a joyous reunion, but I couldn’t. A word of adieu is inevitable, owing to the uncertainty of life. After all, perhaps the goddess of fortune has already composed our fate, no?

Memories are beauteous and warm. Whenever I recollect the scenes of the past, I feel as though I fall into a placid slumber. True, there might be remorse, rancor and abhorrence, but pleasure, splendor and rejoicing are of much more importance. At times I feel trapped in the straits of Scylla and Charybdis. Yet, I do not falter nor relinquish my faith. I would rather indulge myself in vagarious dreams than submit to the hardships of reality!

Rain falls, softly, as if a captivating melody. It reminds me of friendship─an argent thread which can ne’er be cut in half. The amicable sun shall rise again soon. I want to say, ”Thank you, my dear friends!”